Is It Bullying...
or Something More?
"Every Child Deserves to Feel Safe at School."
Bullying isn't always "just part of growing up."
When it interferes with a student's education, schools have responsibilities—and parents have important rights.
Disagreements between children happen every day, but bullying is different. Bullying typically involves unwanted aggressive behavior, a real or perceived imbalance of power, and behavior that is repeated or likely to be repeated over time. It may be physical, verbal, social, relational, or electronic.
Schools have a responsibility to provide a safe learning environment where students can access their education without fear of harassment or intimidation.
Bullying vs. Ordinary Conflict
Ordinary Conflict
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Equal balance of power
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Usually isolated
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Both students participate
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Goal is resolving disagreement
Bullying
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Imbalance of power
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Often repeated
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One student is targeted
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Goal is control, intimidation, or harm
Types of Bullying
Physical
Hitting, pushing, kicking, damaging belongings, blocking movement, or unwanted physical contact.
Verbal
Name-calling, insults, threats, teasing, or repeated verbal intimidation.
Social or Relational
Excluding others, spreading rumors, encouraging isolation, embarrassing someone publicly, or damaging friendships.
Cyberbullying
Harassment through text messages, social media, gaming platforms, email, or other digital communication.
Disability-Based Harassment
Targeting a student because of a disability, accommodations, behaviors, assistive technology, or participation in special education.
Sexual or Protected-Class Harassment
Harassment based on sex, race, national origin, religion, or another protected characteristic may also trigger additional legal protections.
Bullying is not simply a disciplinary issue—it can have lasting educational and emotional consequences.
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Attendance
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Grades
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Anxiety
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Depression
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School Refusal
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Confidence
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Social Withdrawal
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Emotional Regulation
Information Block
Students experiencing bullying may begin avoiding school, refusing transportation, losing interest in learning, or demonstrating behaviors that are easily mistaken for laziness, defiance, or a lack of motivation. Before assuming behavior is the problem, it is important to ask whether something at school is causing the behavior.
Warning Signs Parents May Notice
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Doesn't want to go to school
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Complains of headaches or stomachaches
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Begins hiding or losing belongings
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Has damaged clothing or school supplies
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Stops talking about friends
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Has trouble sleeping
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Experiences declining grades
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Avoids riding the bus
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Becomes anxious on Sunday evenings
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Starts requesting to stay home
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Seems withdrawn after school
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Shows sudden changes in behavior or mood
How Schools Should Respond
Schools should take reports of bullying seriously and respond promptly. While procedures vary by district and state, parents can generally expect schools to:
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Receive and document the report.
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Begin an appropriate investigation.
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Take reasonable steps to protect student safety.
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Communicate with parents when appropriate.
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Monitor the situation after intervention.
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Adjust supports if concerns continue.
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Enact stay away plans if needed
The response should focus not only on discipline, but also on restoring a student's ability to safely participate in school.
Enact stay away plans if needed
When Bullying Becomes an IDEA Issue
For students with disabilities, bullying may become more than a discipline issue. If bullying interferes with a student's ability to receive meaningful educational benefit, the IEP Team may need to determine whether additional supports, accommodations, services, or changes are necessary.
Examples may include:
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Counseling services
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Social skills instruction
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Adult check-ins
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Changes to arrival or dismissal procedures
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Schedule adjustments
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Seating changes
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Behavioral supports
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Transportation accommodations
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Review of goals and progress
The focus should remain on ensuring the student continues to receive a Free Appropriate Public Education (FAPE).
What Parents Can Do
Parents do not have to solve the problem alone. Early, organized communication often leads to better outcomes.
Consider:
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Reporting concerns in writing
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Keeping a timeline of incidents
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Saving emails and text messages
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Taking photographs when appropriate
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Requesting meetings
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Asking how the student's education is being affected
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Following up if concerns continue
Bullying Incident Tracker Download
Common Mistakes
Parents do not have to solve the problem alone. Early, organized communication often leads to better outcomes.
Avoid these common pitfalls:
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Waiting too long to report concerns
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Relying only on phone conversations
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Focusing only on punishment instead of educational impact
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Throwing away documentation
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Assuming the school already knows
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Accepting verbal promises without follow-up
Did You Know?
If you believe a criminal offense may have occurred, you can report the incident to local law enforcement. A police investigation is separate from the school's internal investigation and may include reviewing surveillance footage, interviewing witnesses, and collecting other evidence. This can be especially important if there are concerns about assault, abuse, or serious injury.